Can I just tell you how disheartened I am at the possibility that Stewie won't be back until after the all-star break?

And this isn't just because of my long-running BOD slump. I'm not trying to dis Lew -- his batting average more than makes up for the occasional fielding error -- but we can always count on Shannon to get the ball where it needs to go in critical situations.

Sooz, you gotta wash that man right outta your hair. Or at least have a little fling while he's gone. A man leaves you alone for months on end like this, he's gotta know that a woman gets lonely... and a woman has *needs*. What could he expect? Has he put a ring on your finger?

No ring... you are free to have a fling, girl!

always, ALWAYS, give BOD to Luis Rivas when he deserves it.

did we see how cute he was with Clay Matvick after the game? I love this man. Luis Rivas has been my boyfriend since he came off the DL...

Tee-hee, Luis Rivas asd BOD makes Aaron Gleeman tear his hair out. I love it!

BOD nominee: Brian O'Nora, Third-base umpire.

Can we have a G-GOD even if we win? I nominate Torii.

Not that I would ever call Batgirl a liar (words like 'fact' or 'true' or 'foul ball' are SO subjective) but I would like to clarify that while Boo-Berry usually only makes it to store shelves around Halloween time, it is always available at the General Mills Company Store.

I do some copywriting for Big G and get to visit their palatial Golden Valley headquarters every once in a while, and if you can make it past the roving security geese on the lawn, the efficient receptionist at the lobby, the security barriers and the labyrinth of intersecting hallways, you can find a store with shelves permanently stocked with all the monster cereals for $2 a box. It's like a 7-year-old'ss nirvana.

But sorry, no Fruit Brute.

Dear Mr. Goombah,

Thank you so much for the clarification. I apologize to all General Mills workers and their families, and will be buying several boxes of Boo Berry Crunch (?) to make up for it.

Sincerely,
Batgirl

p.s. What about Yummy Mummy?

Dear Mr. mr,

And yes, Torii is certainly the G-GOD. I mean, my word.

Word,
Batgirl

Frightwig, you’re entirely right. The only ring I wear is Goober’s, and since he’s playin’ me -- quite publicly -- with Dougie, I am obviously entitled to some baseball love of my own.

However, my boyfriend selection record has been tainted, to say the least. I jumped into the BOD action last year with Todd “the bod” Sears, who gave me exactly two points before being demoted back to AAA and subsequently traded to San Diego. Similar story with boyfriend #2, Justin Morneau, who just barely had time to show his stuff before being sent back down to Rochester. (Let’s not even get into my flirtation with pitching boyfriend Kenny Rogers, since we all know what happened to him…) Enter boyfriend #3, Shannon Stewart, and the rest is a little piece of post-all-star break comeback history.

Given this track record, you can understand my hesitation to cheat on Shannon, even during his extended affair with plantar fasciitis, since the object of my new and fickle affections would surely be demoted, injured, or faced with some other unseemly end. And with our oh-so-tenuous lead over the Bitch Sox, that would be too much guilt to bear.

Sooz, have you considered a fling with a player you dislike enough to *want* some misfortune to afflict him?

Dear Batgirl,

I hereby announce that effective immediately, my new boyfriend is Frank Thomas.

Strategically yours,

Sooz

Sooz, I was hoping you would say that!

Unfortunately, Frank Thomas was not the one traded to the Marlins last night.

Keep trying! Concentrate!